The quiet ways we care.
What does love mean?
Whether it is romantic love, the love you feel for your family, or the love shared between friends, I think love can mean a million different things.
It has many definitions, many of which I am still trying to figure out as I navigate through life.
But one that hits home for me is consideration.
In the most basic sense, consideration is simply thinking of another person.
Thinking about how your actions might affect them.
Thinking about how your words might make them feel. How a simple phrase like, “I’m always here,” can give someone the strength to keep going. To keep fighting. To remind them that even when life feels unbearably heavy, they do not have to carry it all alone.
It is thinking, How can I make this person feel special? How can I make them feel seen? Especially in a world that sometimes does everything it can to make us feel invisible.
It is thinking about how certain decisions may make them feel, even when those decisions seem small or insignificant to you.
Because when you truly care about someone, their heart becomes something you handle with intention.
Consideration is selfless. It goes beyond simply saying you love someone. It is taking that extra step to notice the tiny details that make someone who they are.
It is remembering someone’s favorite food or flower because they mentioned it once in passing.
It is noticing the way their face lights up when they talk about something they love.
It is remembering the little things they tell you, not because you have to, but because somewhere along the way, the things that matter to them started to matter to you too.
It is noticing when a certain topic or conversation makes someone uncomfortable and caring enough not to push them further.
It is listening—and I mean truly listening—to the person in front of you who is trusting you with their heart. Not listening just so you can respond, but listening so you can understand.
Because there is something so intimate about being remembered.
There is something so beautiful about realizing that someone was paying attention when you thought you were simply talking.
And maybe that is why a lack of consideration can hurt so deeply too.
Sometimes it is not the action itself that breaks our heart. It is the realization that somewhere along the way, we were not thought about. That our feelings were not considered. That someone we would have thought twice about hurting did not think twice about hurting us.
But consideration is also understanding.
Understanding that life will have its ups and downs.
Understanding that life may not always be easy and that the person in front of us may not always have the capacity to love us or show up for us in the ways we need.
And as painful as that can be, their inability to show up for you does not make your worth any less.
Sometimes people can love us and still disappoint us.
Sometimes they can care about us and still get things wrong.
Consideration does not mean perfection. It does not mean never hurting each other or always knowing exactly what the other person needs. We are human, after all.
Maybe it simply means caring enough to try.
Caring enough to ask, “How did that make you feel?”
Caring enough to apologize when you realize you caused pain.
Caring enough to learn the heart of the person you love instead of assuming you already know it.
In any bond, how much someone cares about you can often be seen in how much they consider you.
Not necessarily through grand gestures, expensive gifts, or perfectly chosen words, but through the quiet moments that whisper, I thought of you.
I remembered.
I noticed.
You crossed my mind even when you weren’t in the room.
And maybe that is one of the purest forms of love there is.
To be considered is to be seen.
To be considered is to know that your feelings have a place in someone else’s heart.
And perhaps love, in its simplest form, is just that:
To move through this life knowing that your actions carry another person’s heart with them—and choosing to handle that heart gently.
